Thursday, April 21, 2011
Monday, April 18, 2011
911 call
Today I called 911 for the first time in my life. In the 90 seconds it took for me to buckle Jared into his car seat, Kylie ran. I looked around really quickly and didn't see her, so I got Jared out and looked more seriously. Neighbors began to help, all of us calling for her. I can't describe how I felt. I was trying not to panic, trying not to fall apart, trying to pray, trying to think of where she might have been, dealing with the fact that my eyes weren't finding her, that my ears couldn't hear her voice say, "Here I am!" Could someone have taken her? Yes. But I didn't think that was the case. i was afraid she had crossed a street and been injured - yesterday and today she crossed our little street to the car without me. With streets everywhere and blocks and blocks of townhomes, each with several inviting staircases, I was overwhelmed. She could be anywhere, and she could be gone forever. My heart can't even bear the thought.
A neighbor said, should we call the police? Yes. I knew we should, I was thinking we should take the next step, since no one was finding her. I called 911. "What are you reporting?" Looking back, isn't that a weird thing to say? The movies always say, "911. What's your emergency?" I told them my location, my name, after I told them that I couldn't find my daughter. I started to choke on my sobs to admit it, so say and spell her name and explain what had happened. I decided to expand my search farther from the car and had the thought to go up. While on the phone with 911 I went up the hill one block to the very top and saw 2 teenage boys. They looked relieved to see me and I knew. My heart was suddenly full of hope that they had seen her based on the recognition in their faces. I turned the corner and saw my friend Robyn, there with a few other people, and sweet little Kylie. Thank you God! Thank you so much! Oh my baby. I just lost it and hugged her. She started crying too, because she always cries when I cry. I was so so scared. Sometimes I dream about losing her or Jared, and it's the scariest, most heart-wrenching fear for a mother.
"They found her!" I told the 911 lady. I don't know what she said after that and I don't care. Though I half expected a police officer to knock on my door and ask me some questions. Luckily they probably just saw me as another scared parent in a situation without any real trouble brewing. They answered so fast - no ringing, and I'm grateful to have law enforcement on our side. She had run up the hill - and I mean run, because my eye was off her for just about 90 seconds - and after a few minutes noticed that I didn't follow. She started asking, "mommy?" and the 2 teenage boys took her to my friend Robyn's house thinking she might be her daughter. So Robyn came out to find her mommy. It's been so long that Robyn didn't recognize her; but maybe Kylie remembers Robyn since Robyn looks the same. Thank you Heavenly Father for keeping her safe, unharmed, while I, Mat Merkley and all his neighbors were in a panic.
I am definitely going to keep a closer eye on my kids. I never leave the house empty handed (like with cupcakes to deliver today), and by the time I lock the door these last 2 days, Jared's walking up the stairs to the neighbors, or to the back of the apartment foilage, and Kylie's crossed the street out of sight to the car. Yes. We will be having even more talks and practices leaving the house and staying close to Mommy. My hair will be gray in no time at this rate! But I am so relieved. I even feel better having written all this down, like closure. Admitting that today happened and that everything is ok again. I love her so much, I can't think about today without getting emotional. It's like the day I thought I lost Jared to a miscarriage - I was 13 weeks and started gushing blood. My heart sank into despair - the truest grief I've felt I think, only to be lifted up a few hours later knowing that my little peanut was ok.
Thankfully for me, these lessons come with very happy endings.
A neighbor said, should we call the police? Yes. I knew we should, I was thinking we should take the next step, since no one was finding her. I called 911. "What are you reporting?" Looking back, isn't that a weird thing to say? The movies always say, "911. What's your emergency?" I told them my location, my name, after I told them that I couldn't find my daughter. I started to choke on my sobs to admit it, so say and spell her name and explain what had happened. I decided to expand my search farther from the car and had the thought to go up. While on the phone with 911 I went up the hill one block to the very top and saw 2 teenage boys. They looked relieved to see me and I knew. My heart was suddenly full of hope that they had seen her based on the recognition in their faces. I turned the corner and saw my friend Robyn, there with a few other people, and sweet little Kylie. Thank you God! Thank you so much! Oh my baby. I just lost it and hugged her. She started crying too, because she always cries when I cry. I was so so scared. Sometimes I dream about losing her or Jared, and it's the scariest, most heart-wrenching fear for a mother.
"They found her!" I told the 911 lady. I don't know what she said after that and I don't care. Though I half expected a police officer to knock on my door and ask me some questions. Luckily they probably just saw me as another scared parent in a situation without any real trouble brewing. They answered so fast - no ringing, and I'm grateful to have law enforcement on our side. She had run up the hill - and I mean run, because my eye was off her for just about 90 seconds - and after a few minutes noticed that I didn't follow. She started asking, "mommy?" and the 2 teenage boys took her to my friend Robyn's house thinking she might be her daughter. So Robyn came out to find her mommy. It's been so long that Robyn didn't recognize her; but maybe Kylie remembers Robyn since Robyn looks the same. Thank you Heavenly Father for keeping her safe, unharmed, while I, Mat Merkley and all his neighbors were in a panic.
I am definitely going to keep a closer eye on my kids. I never leave the house empty handed (like with cupcakes to deliver today), and by the time I lock the door these last 2 days, Jared's walking up the stairs to the neighbors, or to the back of the apartment foilage, and Kylie's crossed the street out of sight to the car. Yes. We will be having even more talks and practices leaving the house and staying close to Mommy. My hair will be gray in no time at this rate! But I am so relieved. I even feel better having written all this down, like closure. Admitting that today happened and that everything is ok again. I love her so much, I can't think about today without getting emotional. It's like the day I thought I lost Jared to a miscarriage - I was 13 weeks and started gushing blood. My heart sank into despair - the truest grief I've felt I think, only to be lifted up a few hours later knowing that my little peanut was ok.
Thankfully for me, these lessons come with very happy endings.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Friday, April 8, 2011
A long but amazing story!
Today I had to most amazing missionary experience, I can't even believe it! It started with Kylie bringing me my BYU sweatshirt and asking to go to the library. We went yesterday, but I thought, "why not? I need to go to the church anyway and pick up supplies to babysit at the temple tomorrow." So I planned a picnic and drove us to the church, then got out the stroller and we walked to the library. We approached the front entrance because we were walking. I noticed an older man sitting on the side rail and he said, "it's closed." Oh! I forgot that on Fridays they don't open until 1. We asked each other at the same time, "do you know what time it is?" I looked at my phone and we still had an hour until the library opened.
He commented on the cute kids and I could hear his Spanish accent. So I felt like answering in Spanish. He was surprised. We talked (all in Spanish) about BYU a little with a nice visual from my sweatshirt. I was walking away and suddenly turned around to see if he needed a ride or something. I don't know why! He said he lived close, and I said I was walking to church. That opened the floodgate! He showed me his well read Santa Biblia and asked about my church. After a minute he asked if he could walk us back.
What?!? I would never walk to my car alone with 2 kids and a stranger! But somehow I wasn't scared at all and it just felt right like I had known him for a while. It felt safe. So we walked and talked and talked and talked about the Bible, about God and Jesus Christ, about the organization of my church and his experiences in different churches. This man KNEW the Bible and understood so much! He had a testimony of our Savior and how His death and resurrection enables us to repent and live with God again. He knew that if one really believes, he should live like Jesus did and be an example. He even knew the importance of baptism by immersion! I couldn't believe it.
I happened to have Josh's church key and invited him into the church building. What?!? But I'm not crazy! It just felt natural. I explained all about our 3 hours of church and the Sacrament and how it's like the Last Supper. The kids were making us nervous on the choir stairs so we headed out to the courtyard. It was beautiful weather today and for 2 hours the kids just played! This stranger poured his heart and soul out to me and is SO READY FOR THE GOSPEL! He knows it already! I couldn't believe it. It was so great to meet someone who really knows the scriptures and wants to avoid all confusion and just know the truth.
So I got his information and gave him mine and he said he would give The Book of Mrmon another shot. I guess he read a little about 10 years ago. THis guy's wife left him for recent desire to study the Bible and search for religion. But with tears of sadness he still exclaimed with a positive attitude how God has a plan for him!
At home I looked up the number of the Bishop of the Spanish Branch to get the meeting time and the missionaries info. And I totally know him! 2 weeks ago an old piano student's dad was made the bishop of the Spanish branch! Can you believe it?
My own testimony has been so strengthened. 1. God KNOWS us and has a hand in the details - the details! - of our lives. To the minute and which library entrance we should take! He loves us. 2. the scriptures are true and bring us to our Savior. How can we serve him if we don't know His words? 3. If Josh and I weren't willing to sacrifice and babysit at the temple tomorrow so lots of parents in our ward could go inside, none of this would have happened! I wouldn't have walked to the library because I wouldn't have needed to go to the church building and I wouldn't have had Josh's key. What a blessing!!!!!!!!! I'm really excited. (obviously) I know that this man's faith will pull him through all the challenges that he'll ever face.
He commented on the cute kids and I could hear his Spanish accent. So I felt like answering in Spanish. He was surprised. We talked (all in Spanish) about BYU a little with a nice visual from my sweatshirt. I was walking away and suddenly turned around to see if he needed a ride or something. I don't know why! He said he lived close, and I said I was walking to church. That opened the floodgate! He showed me his well read Santa Biblia and asked about my church. After a minute he asked if he could walk us back.
What?!? I would never walk to my car alone with 2 kids and a stranger! But somehow I wasn't scared at all and it just felt right like I had known him for a while. It felt safe. So we walked and talked and talked and talked about the Bible, about God and Jesus Christ, about the organization of my church and his experiences in different churches. This man KNEW the Bible and understood so much! He had a testimony of our Savior and how His death and resurrection enables us to repent and live with God again. He knew that if one really believes, he should live like Jesus did and be an example. He even knew the importance of baptism by immersion! I couldn't believe it.
I happened to have Josh's church key and invited him into the church building. What?!? But I'm not crazy! It just felt natural. I explained all about our 3 hours of church and the Sacrament and how it's like the Last Supper. The kids were making us nervous on the choir stairs so we headed out to the courtyard. It was beautiful weather today and for 2 hours the kids just played! This stranger poured his heart and soul out to me and is SO READY FOR THE GOSPEL! He knows it already! I couldn't believe it. It was so great to meet someone who really knows the scriptures and wants to avoid all confusion and just know the truth.
So I got his information and gave him mine and he said he would give The Book of Mrmon another shot. I guess he read a little about 10 years ago. THis guy's wife left him for recent desire to study the Bible and search for religion. But with tears of sadness he still exclaimed with a positive attitude how God has a plan for him!
At home I looked up the number of the Bishop of the Spanish Branch to get the meeting time and the missionaries info. And I totally know him! 2 weeks ago an old piano student's dad was made the bishop of the Spanish branch! Can you believe it?
My own testimony has been so strengthened. 1. God KNOWS us and has a hand in the details - the details! - of our lives. To the minute and which library entrance we should take! He loves us. 2. the scriptures are true and bring us to our Savior. How can we serve him if we don't know His words? 3. If Josh and I weren't willing to sacrifice and babysit at the temple tomorrow so lots of parents in our ward could go inside, none of this would have happened! I wouldn't have walked to the library because I wouldn't have needed to go to the church building and I wouldn't have had Josh's key. What a blessing!!!!!!!!! I'm really excited. (obviously) I know that this man's faith will pull him through all the challenges that he'll ever face.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
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